a ball on the hill

It was a long hiatus from interwebs. I did many things.
I made an ugly shirt into one of the cutest things I own. I spent the entire weekend with Nick: eating in various diners, watching cartoons, hunting down stuff unsuccessfully at Anime Pavillion, successfully hunting down stuff at Blockbuster, not watching movies due to wine and champagne and later whiskey, spending half of each day in bed wavering through various states of sleepy-wakefulness, hiking around gorgeous Virginia hillside, discussing attractive females we noticed along the way and methods of generally violating them, and looking at pictures of deformed fetuses his roommate had taken at some museum.
It's been hard getting used to my fingernails being gone. Nick says I've been domesticated and that he likes it much better this way. So that is how it is to be now, until I grow new ones that I have learned not to use. I'd so much rather have nails I can't use than to have no nails at all. My hands don't look like they belong to me anymore.
Also, this boy has been calling me non-stop. Literally. Like eight times in the past three or four days. I met him through Ashley, a girl who worked the afternoon shift at Exxon, when they came in together for blunt wraps and other such stuff, and they were dating. And now, what with all these phone calls I'm not entirely sure that they're still dating. Although. I did go in there the other night, when I was out with Nick and she definitely eyed me up AND down [I had a tiny little-girl style empire-waistline cotton dress on that came down to juuuuust past my panties and of course flared everywhere, with adorably patterned fishnets and my big goth mary janes and a thick belt under my bust], and so he could be calling so THEY can hang out with me. Though he did NOT specify that on the phone today. Just "hang out" is what he said. And that's just fine. I know he's a smoker and I know he's cute enough for me to have flirted with him before I realized he was dating my co-worker. Yay for that. I'm going to call him tomorrow. There will be hanging out.
Now that I think about it, I have no idea how he got my number. There is the chance that I gave it to him when I met him [he showed me his plants and gave me a gift and told me he could help me out if I needed him to], and there is the chance that Ashley snagged it, but seriously. I wouldn't know what else to consider.
Oh well.
It was minorly annoying, though, the fact that he had been calling "early" on Saturday, when Nick and I were still in bed... But then again, Nick and I got out of bed sometime after two, two-thirty. And then I told him I would call him and he still called me several times both Sunday AND today. Until finally I answered.
What can I say, I find desperation minorly annoying but hella adorable. Makes me smirk.

I think I perplex Nick because I am submissive and yet simultaneously dominating. I dominate in mental ways, in social situations, with boys I view as playthings or with girls in general--not because I view them as playthings the way I do men but because I like to see them bend to my will. And, likewise, I enjoy bending to theirs. I think he's finally really noticed that I will do anything he says, but sometimes I question him or wrinkle my nose or gripe a bit, and though I essentially behave I have given the illusion of disobedience. I think he MAY have noticed that I like to dominate social situations by staring down whomever is speaking to him or by just taking control of them before he does. The latter applies only to situations involving women directly, like in restaurats or grocery stores. Situations in which I am usually checking out the girl obviously and he is in a more clandestine manner. I dominate conversationally as much as possible, and on more than one occasion I've found myself caught in a Scorpio stare-down.
I'm pretty sure Nick has never dealt with a submissive dominant before.
I do love to do what is asked or needed of me; It makes me happy to perform tasks I've been appointed or to have expectations placed upon me and I wouldn't trade the happiness I get from being submissive and being owned, but I still like to know that somewhere underneath I am orchestrating this dance just as much as the master.

That is enough for now.
I am done.